10 things that go through your head writing an essay

Can you guess what I’ve been up to?! Yep, it’s that time of year where I’ve got essays up to here and having spent the whole of the Christmas holidays going “I’ll just do it after Christmas”, after Christmas has hit and boy has it hit hard…  

Here’s to the things that go through my mind whilst trying to do an essay. Also I really wish my essays just consisted of two books and not the 35 that I had surrounding me the other day… (slight over exaggeration but meh.)
1. Oh god, I’ve actually got to start it. Okay. Let’s get some books, look up some research, get cracking and maybe I can get it done by the end of tomorrow. Let’s do this. 

2. Yeah, I’ve got some sources. None of them mean anything, but y’know. Sources. I wonder what’s happening on BBC news… no. Research. Rese-… oooh Facebook message! 

3. Right gonna start writing. Introduction… shit, how do I even write essays?! They should do lessons on this. 

4. 200 words down. Cool. Only like 2300 to go. No biggie. Just powering through… I mean I’ve got more books around me than the library but y’know. Yolo. 

5. Fuck my life this is how I die. Writing this essay. Oh my god. Death would be preferable. Nobody cares about my essay, why am I even writing it… 

6. I’ve written 500 words. It’s totally acceptable to go make my 9th cup of coffee and then play a bit of Sims… NO. Work. Come on. Write the damn essay. Maybe 10 mins of sims… nobody will know… Word. Word will know. The paper clip will probably pop up and judge me. 

7. Oh god how do I even reference. Who invented Harvard bloody referencing. Do I put year here or author or what?! Is this quote even relevant? Oh who even gives a crap anymore, the quote’s about lipstick but I’ll fit it into an essay on theatre somehow…

8. I’ve actually made some pretty good points here. Yaaaaas. Whacking this out of the park. Oh. Wait. I need to reference it. My tutor’s going to definitely give me a third if I don’t reference that point that is completely my thoughts but should probably be backed up by something. Ffs. 

9. I never want to view another journal article again. I never want to see Word again. And how do I still have 500 more words to go?? Nobody has this much to write about any topic! Ever! 

10. I’m done! I’m free! I’m 10% under the word count but that’s what it’s there for, to be utilised. I’m gonna have some wine and a takeaway to reward myself for my incredible intelligence and flair. Just two more essays to go… just… two… *sobs quietly in a corner* 
17th January can’t come soon enough guys… 

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